Absolute Zero

February 29, 2008

The Birth of Smarmy Matt

Filed under: Blog News,Japan,Smarmy Matt — throughhim413 @ 1:38 am

I’ve decided this blog lacks life, probably because I never give it any. This will also give me some kind of lasting record of things, though I’m likely never to read it again. For the time being, I’m in Japan. As always, I’m half jaded and half amused. Meaning I can make fun of things without actually feeling anything is horribly wrong with life. When I first got to Japan, I was going to make a separate blog. That never happened, but I do have a few things I wrote just after getting here. I thought that a fun way to do this would be to criticize my own opinions, perhaps helping those who haven’t been to Japan and want to go or just amuse those who want to be amused. Therefore, anything in red is something written in the past. Expect ridiculous things. I don’t expect to edit any of this before posting it, so these are things I ACTUALLY THOUGHT at one point. Don’t be afraid. All of these humor posts about everyday life will carry the new tag: Smarmy Matt. This is the name of my Mii on my Wii. Perhaps that story will come someday. For now, let us proceed.

For some reason, the Japanese discovered the washing machine and the dish washer, but they skipped right over the dryer components that we all know and love.

This is totally true. It’s not the actual fact that baffles me, it’s the justification for it. “We don’t need to have a dryer for our clothes, we have the sun!” Now, I’ve got nothing against environmentalists and what not, but that has nothing to do with this. The people that have said this to me (and there have been several) have this tone that almost seems to indicate the sun is one of Japan’s exclusive blessings. It was one of those moments where there were too many things that I wanted to say at once and so none of them came out.  I just didn’t have the heart to tell them that the sun is capable of drying clothes anywhere.  Rainy days are the BEST time to do your laundry in the States.   But here, with even the possible threat of rain, you have to put it off.  Also, you really have to plan ahead since even outside, some of my thicker clothes take hours to dry.

For a country with so many weird and often meaningless gadgets, you’d think that something like the dryer would be a great move.  It’s one of those things I took for granted back home, but no longer.  I’m all about saving time.  Though, I suppose with so many housewives, there’s honestly no need to do the laundry quickly.  This was supposed to be more interesting, but now I’m talking about washing my clothes…  Has this idea already gone awry?  I guess we’ll all just have to wait and see.  I will most likely be making at least one post a day under this heading.  Unless I get lazy (and I do).



  1. This is an awesome idea and I support it. Little odd things are always amusing reads. Also that is a really interesting fact, I had no idea. I have a feeling I’ going to find myself spewing that to people in conversations how. “Hey! Did you know that…” *crazy wavy lines flashing over my head*

    Comment by Brendan — February 29, 2008 @ 5:41 pm

  2. Haha, I love this. It’s definitely enjoyable to hear just how weird Japan is, because most of us in the States don’t get always get just how crazy that country is.

    Comment by Brad — March 2, 2008 @ 6:25 pm

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